‘Hot Coffee’ Stirs Up Bullshit
I’m sure you’ve all heard about the infamous sex minigame in Grand Theft Auto San Andreas, dubbed ‘Hot Coffee‘, so I’ll spare you the details. The whole re-rating of the game to make an adults only title is completely ridiculous! It should have been rated AO to begin with. The thing that makes it so incredibly lame is the fact that none of the major retailers [in the States] will stock AO rated games. San Andreas was previously rated Mature, which means you have to be at least 17 to purchase or rent the game. An AO rating bumps the age requirement up to… prepare yourself… 18!
So, what’s the difference between the game that was rated ‘Mature’ and the new version that’s rated ‘Adults Only’? Sexual intercourse. No, not the mass killing. Not beating down prostitutes and stealing their money. And definitely not the disgusting, racist comments that spew from the mouths of the ignorant characters in the game. The lead character Carl, can have sex with his girlfriend after successfully completing a mission… only if you have the mod installed that unlocks the minigame.
To quote the South Park movie – What’s the big fuckin’ deal, bitch? I really can’t wrap my head around the fact that no one has a problem with all these other things that are right there, in the game, all the time. And that this whole deal is over CJ having consensual sex with his girlfriend.
To top it all off, let’s not forget how horribly bad San Andreas looks. It’s not like you’re watching some sexy, realistic scene here. It’s more like two people who are made of bricks rubbing against each other. After all, CJ doesn’t take his pants off. Last time I checked, that was a requirement if you’re planning to do the deed.